My couch and I have a very committed relationship.

Cancelled plans. Best date I've had with my couch all year.

Today's to-do list: nothing, and I'm ahead of schedule.

I'm not lazy. I'm in energy-saving mode.

I'm not ignoring the chores. I'm giving them space to grow.

Ordered food delivery for something in the next room. Peak efficiency.

Doomscrolled so long my screen time report needs therapy.