Dating Disasters memes

Their profile said 'adventurous'. They meant 'late to everything'.

First date checklist: escape plan, backup excuse, snacks.

They ghosted me so hard I had to call a paranormal investigator.

We matched, talked for a week, then they vanished like my weekend.

Dating apps: like online shopping, but everything's out of stock.

Swiped so much my thumb filed for workers' comp.

Said I was low maintenance. Ordered three desserts. Honesty is optional.

Our first date was so awkward the waiter asked if we needed a mediator.

Waited 40 minutes. Ate the bread basket. Honestly, a good date.

They said they're 'not like other people'. Correct, they're worse at texting.

They talked about themselves for two hours. I learned a lot. About leaving.

Date asked what I'm looking for. Me: the exit, mostly.

Wrote a casual text for 40 minutes. Very casual. Extremely casual.

Our date was going great until they chewed with their mouth open.

Date suggested we split the bill. Then ordered the lobster.

Fancy restaurant first date: tiny food, huge regrets.

Video date tip: put a good lamp behind you and a better excuse ready.

Bio said 'love to travel'. Meant to the fridge.